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Eight Life Lessons to Live By

Posted in: Articles, Articles, Articles
By
Mar 22, 2008 - 2:22:34 PM

By Michael G. Rayel, MD

 

“Some people dare to dream only for themselves. Mama dared to dream for the benefit of others. Mama willingly shared what she had and made others better off.”

I shared these words of wisdom with relatives and friends as we bade Mama good-bye last year. It was a painful, difficult moment for us. However, her contributions to life overshadowed the hurt associated with her unexpected departure.

Even before I could fully recover, I decided to name an award to honor her memory and to celebrate her walk on this earth. “Oikos Global Award - Lourdes Gregorio Rayel Outstanding Youth Award” is a fitting tribute to a woman who made a difference in the lives of her family, relatives, and friends.

Perhaps you’d wonder, “Who is she?” “Does she deserve it?”

In 2001, Mama visited Clarenville and stayed with us for about six months. As she walked around the block with her grandkids, our neighbors would greet her with sweet smiles and warm hellos. She was amazed how kind people were. She just loved this place!

Let me tell you more about Mama and what I learned from her. In fact, I’d like to share with you eight life lessons that inspired me all these years. I believe that these lessons are Mama’s legacy and I hope that we can all learn from her life.

 
First life lesson: Be Enthusiastic


Mama was always enthusiastic. She was enthusiastic as a teacher, as a businesswoman, and as a mother. A relative once commented that my mom was “a woman in a hurry” and “always busy.” And yet you could always find a smile on her face, even during stressful times. It was her positive attitude and enthusiasm that helped her develop long-term friendships and business relationships all through the years.

 
Second life lesson:  Pursue Your Priorities

 
When she got married, she committed to raise her family the best way she could. Mama was always willing to provide her precious time. We prayed, went to church, and had fun together as a family. Many times, she had to swallow her pride just to borrow Boy Scout uniform or rent formal attire so we could participate in school programs.

Early on, she made us aware of her mission — to provide us with college education regardless of her financial circumstance. She considered education as the only way to prepare us for the future.

 
Third life lesson: Develop a Strong Focus

 
Mama worked hard. She used to wake up early (around 5 AM) despite going to bed late (around 1 or 2 AM) to prepare the store for the day. Aside from her day job as a teacher, she was a full-time businesswoman in the evenings. She took care of her small restaurant and barbershop after work. On school days, I saw her rush to work not just with a lesson plan but also with products in tow. Through hard work and focus, Mama and Papa expanded their farm and grew their small business.

 
Fourth life lesson: Establish Your Integrity

 
Mama’s fellow teachers and friends talked about her integrity. Her words were consistently followed by appropriate actions. In short, her words were her actions and vice versa. No wonder, she gained the trust of her friends, relatives, and customers.

 
Fifth life lesson: Believe in Your Abilities

 
Mama made us believe that we could achieve our goals. I was only ten years old when she would announce to everyone how “intelligent” my siblings and I were. Mama was always proud of us. She valued us. She often reminded us that we had a bright future. Because of her unceasing praise and positive expectations, we have confidence and strong belief in ourselves.

 
Sixth life lesson: Practice Self-Reflection

 
As a teenager, I used to share with her my unconventional ideas about morality, religion, and politics. Instead of making comments, she would listen intently and made sure she understood me. Even during those times when I made mistakes, she never argued nor gave advice.

But I realized later that her “quiet” response allowed me to analyze and criticize my own thoughts and behavior during my quiet moments. Likewise, it allowed me to learn from my mistakes through self-reflection.

 
Seventh life lesson: Be Generous

 
Mama epitomizes a life of generosity. She gave even if she had little. I remember as a young boy when she had to borrow money so she could give to a relative or a close friend who needed urgent help. In addition, she sent some of our relatives’ kids to school. She liked to help because she experienced the harsh reality of poverty when she was young. It was this profound sensitivity that endeared her to the hearts of others.

 
Eighth life lesson: Have Faith

 
Like any person who dealt with family problems, she suffered from sleepless nights and emotional pain. During challenging times, her only refuge was prayer. I saw her endure from many ordeals. She wept and lost weight. And yet through prayers, she maintained her equanimity and survived the worst storms in her life.

Life gave Mama its wonders and hardships, its opportunities and challenges, and its surprises and disappointments. No doubt, she embraced them all with acceptance and firm resolve.

Mama lived a life of purpose. She dared to dream so others can pursue their own dreams — till the end.


Congratulations to Philippe de Montigny of Edmonton, AB for winning the 2006 Oikos Global Award – Lourdes Gregorio Rayel Outstanding Youth Award!

 

About the Author:


Dr. Michael G. Rayel — author, game inventor, and psychiatrist — has created the Oikos Game Series to promote emotional health. Since 2005, he has published Oikos’ Insights! as a resource for personal development. Suggest a topic at www.oikosglobal.com


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